When the Fog Keeps You Going Round in Circles

© TEA Press

Sometimes you cannot think your way to clarity. You think about the decision or the circumstance. Then you think about it again. You imagine what might happen. You reconsider. You ask someone what they think. You come to one conclusion, then immediately find a reason to doubt it. So you think some more, and somehow, after all that thinking, you seem to be no further forward. Sometimes the problem isn't that you haven't thought enough, but that you may be caught in a Fog Loop.

When thinking becomes a loop

A Fog Loop can look something like this: Confusion → hesitation → avoidance → more confusion. You aren't necessarily choosing to avoid something. You may be trying very hard to resolve it. But when clarity feels difficult, overwhelming, or impossible, thinking can become circular. You keep returning to the same questions without arriving anywhere new. The more uncertain you feel, the more you hesitate. The more you hesitate, the harder it becomes to know what to do. And the less you do, the more uncertain everything can begin to feel. The fog thickens!

Why we can stay there

Sometimes uncertainty feels safer than clarity. If you don't quite know what you want, you don't have to act on it. If you haven't made a decision, you don't have to face its consequences. If you keep searching for more certainty, you can postpone the moment when something has to change. This doesn't mean you're deliberately keeping yourself stuck. Sometimes the fog is doing a job. It can protect you from having to process or act on more than you currently have the capacity for. Perhaps you’re waiting for a piece of vital information before you can move. But what protects you from overload can also make it harder to know where you stand.

More thinking isn't always more clarity

We often assume that if we think hard enough, eventually the answer will appear. Sometimes it does. But sometimes more thinking gives the fog more material to work with: another possibility; another consequence; another what if? Another reason to doubt yourself. You can become very busy without becoming any clearer. So perhaps the question isn't: “What else can I think about?” Perhaps it is:

“What can I notice?”
“What do I actually know?”
“What has become clear, even if only slightly?”
“What am I avoiding noticing?”
“What remains steady?”
These are small questions, but they can begin to interrupt the loop.

You don't have to solve the whole thing

Breaking a Fog Loop doesn't necessarily require a major decision. In fact, trying to make one when you are deeply uncertain can add more pressure. Sometimes what helps is something much smaller. A single honest acknowledgement. Writing down what you actually know. Admitting that you don't know. Taking one low-stakes step. Noticing something you have been trying not to notice. The aim isn't to force the fog to lift. It is to create one small point of orientation. A single point of clarity may be enough to begin changing the conditions. Sometimes clarity begins not with finding the answer, but with noticing what is already true. The problem may not be that you don't know enough. It may be that you haven't yet allowed what you already know to count.

Are there things you already know but keep searching beyond?